“People like you and I love to feel the most of everything. I want to be the most angry I can be…the happiest, the most sad.”
She’s right. I just wish the experience would feel like that gasp of air after a near-drowning.
I felt it. It sucked. But im fucking alive.
Sometimes a song comes through my headphones that used to make all the hairs on my neck stand up.
I’d close my eyes and think about how the lyrics were so on point with how I felt about you. I’d make my own mini-montage of our best moments. Our first night swim. The bouquet custom-crafted from your garden.
Today, I heard a song and closed my eyes. Again, that tingly feeling runs through to the end of my toes but I couldn’t see you anymore. It felt so good. I’m fading into new.
Haven’t I met you before?
I sit there and laugh…some of your jokes were even funny. I wanted to be there, I really did but I don’t deserve it. Nobody really does anymore. I have everything and nothing to offer.
One day you’ll be sobbing on the floor because I hit all the right spots and I’ll remember how it used to rip me to shreds to see you like that. But I won’t say anything. I won’t feel anything.
And my friends will ask me every night where you are. I know where you are. I’ll say I don’t know. I won’t want you anymore and I’ll feel uncomfortable when your mother calls me and signs off with an “I love you.”
We’ll spend days in bed ordering in, high out of our minds. Laughing at eachother because that’s all we like to do now.
I’ll move onto the night.
You’ll move out and I’m left here not wanting to eat or sleep. It’s not because I miss you. I just want to feel like myself again.
So I can’t be here anymore. And I’ve met you before.
I want to look like this everyday.
Things that are true.
Lots of people say they like wine. Usually, it means they’ve seen the movie “Sideways” or “Bottle Shock” and know they shouldn’t like Merlot.
Sometimes, your friends don’t know what the fuck they are talking about. They give terrible advice. Seriously, why do we keep asking for their input. Better yet, why do they give it when you just want them to listen.
People that don’t think Meryl Streep or Adele are talented probably fight pitbulls with puppies for fun. Report them to the police at once.
Women that were attractive for their *entire lives think they are also interesting and funny people. They are probably not.
Men that were attractive for their entire lives never had to develop much of a personality. They won’t be funny either.
You are not as attractive as your facebook photo.
Most people don’t want your honesty even when they ask it. Most people want to hear exactly what they want to hear and will think you’re a cunt if you are a girl.
These people need to grow up.
Birthday eating gatherings are awkward. If you’re fortunate to have many friends, you’re mixing groups of people that don’t know each other.
Olivia Palermo and Kim Kardashian are in the same group of people as far as I’m concerned.
Men who are awkward and shy are usually hot and nice people but you’re so turned off by their lack of assertiveness that you overlook them. Men who talk to you are the complete opposite of that.
It you approach a woman at a bar, you should probably just be honest and say “I want to do you” instead of thinking of a smooth relevant topic to talk about (there won’t be one.)
Being at the same bar/venue means fuck all about the type of person you are. Friends constantly drag each other to places for a number of reasons.
Gaucho pants were never ok. Your ass always looked like it was eating them.
Sometimes, you do things for the most undeserving people and then you do it again and then you’re all like “why?” and then you’re like “oh, because I love them” but then a couple minutes later you’re all like “whoa, i’ll probably never reap anything from this. will I” and then something awful will happen to you like a pet dying or stabbing.
Most of the time, life is boring and you have to distract yourself by being really good at TWO of the following a) work b) your personality c) being pretty to make up for the fact that you’re not good at anything/ interesting or *c) drinking. But if your answer is just C, you must be in college so that’s ok.
If not, watch Leaving Las Vegas immediately, get some exercise, and stop hanging out with your enabling friends.
Cheese is delicious. Bacon is delicious. Bread is delicious. Always. If you say they are not it’s because you’re being health conscious and thus, annoying the shit out of everyone around you. There is no other valid opinion.
Finally, if you watch a movie about space or the ocean. Lots of people are going to die and Murphy’s law is inevitable. Also, Samuel L. Jackson will be in this movie.
don’t all us asian girls have a major girly crush on LIU FUCKING WEN!?
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REP IT!
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Worse than Failure.There is only one thing worse than failure—it’s someone who doesn’t try.
I know a 40-something yr. old who lives with his parents, works sporadically at their small business and plays computer games all day. I’m sure at one point in his life he was optimistic but I never knew that man. The man I know is cynical, jaded, and bitter about experiences that he has never even had. He is a coward—a shell of a person. And I’m sure I come off harsh but I would respect him more if his lifestyle was the result of thousands of trial and errors.
Can you imagine a life so meaningless? People overuse the phrase “waste of space”
Also,on an unrelated note it is not slick to be high, wasted, fake-hippies with absolutely no ambitions or talents and hang out with other deadbeats that justify your “rock star” lifestyle. A real friend is someone who stabs you in the front when you’re being a cunt or when you’re living life like a character from a Judd Apatow film.
There is a level of commitment to trying. You have to be relentless, be able to go all the way to the edge of “I’m not good enough” then hold yourself up just a little longer. Never trying is the only thing worse than failure.
Merry xmas!
Celebrating for the woman who: loved when we bought her krispy kremes or bbq, stubbornly/annoyingly only cared about her family’s well being at the expense of others’, soothed my mosquito bites with the smoke from her cigarettes.
Finally thank you for always blaming my brother when I cried and raising us for a chunk of our life so your daughter could start a life in America.
I’ve always been annoyed with my family. But before the new year turned, I realized how minute my frustrations were.
They say you enter life alone and you leave it that way—and it’s completely true but it still says a lot about a person when there are other people willing to hold your hand over to the other side.
Two people often create another life just to bow out gracefully so that new life can start another one and so on. For the lucky ones, we’ve had someone that did that at one point. Take a second and try to picture someone you love, now picture them realizing they’ve been completely abandoned by someone they’ve devoted themselves to so selflessly.
I’m going to try my hardest next year not to retreat from people just because I like having someone to blame. I wake up every day now knowing it’s a second chance to turn my life around. How great is that?! ONWARD!
